Tagged “life”

Changing norms of intimacy and love over time, and the modern shift to people who are in love want to have sex.

Archived version

Excellent review and discussion of Couples Therapy.

don't need to hyper optimize every moment all of the time

Actual practical accessibility solutions to people's actual issues.

asker is 23!

no projects, not side hustles, not reading to learn.
just sitting

don't get famous, this sounds horrendous

On portraits, and some on photography in general. On storytelling with photos, that every picture has some story.

Funny that kids sometimes didn't want photos of themselves, when people get older they complain that they look old.

I think you drastically over-estimate how "fulfilling" something like therapy is.
Day in and day out you will see people you desperately wish to help, who if they listened to 20% of what you offered would see their lives change immensely, only to watch them repeat the same behavior without change day in and day out.

your todo list actually has infinitely more items on it, and you are going to die before it's finished.

Worry about hard things before impossible ones

"For the first time since his creation man will be faced with his real, his permanent problem — how to use his freedom from pressing economic cares, how to occupy the leisure, which science and compound interest will have won.

Kurzgesagt inspired by the Wait But Why post.

I think one reason many people feel a crisis of meaning is they feel commoditized—and they are! You’re one among millions, not one in a million. Your classmates took the same courses and extracurricular activities. Your friends consume the same podcasts, books, and TV shows. Your co-workers are trained to replace you if you leave.

But we’re human beings, we do not want to be replaceable. We desperately want to be valued for who we are. Becoming disentangled from your web of mutual commitments, shared history, and collective responsibility is to be rendered into a transaction, a slave.2

I like the idea, kinda agree with "this cheat sheet is likely to be come your weakest link in your security threat model" - where should you keep it?!

via hn

Tips from Kevin Kelly :

Accept compliments with thanks.
Getting cheated occasionally is a small price to pay for trusting the best in everyone
When invited to something in the future, ask yourself, Would I do this tomorrow?
The thing that made you weird as a kid could make you great as an adult.
It’s not an apology if it comes with an excuse.
Ignore what they are thinking of you because they are not thinking of you.
If you think you saw a mouse, you did, and if there is one, there are others.
The biggest lie we tell ourselves is, “I don’t need to write this down because I will remember it.”

If your hourly rate gets too high, how to justify doing anything that isn't billable?

Some good work/life balance suggestions and options in the comments

Some good advice on finding ways of enjoying work or life or both, and being wary of taking advice from entrepreneurs - they've gambled and won.

Now that years have passed since I stopped, I don’t mind telling people that I trained to be an opera singer. I used to be ashamed of it, though I’m not sure what exactly felt shameful – the admission that I’d once wanted to be part of that world or the fact that I’d failed.

pitfalls with early retirement; planning for 7 decades of financial independence is a bigger challenge than some claim

Some interesting comments on the novelty aspect, routine, familiarity, perception of time

Advice gathered by someone smarter than me. My top three of their picks:

• minor barriers aren't minor
• remember what used to work, then do it again
• when choosing a life path, think about what contexts it puts you in

First two from Chris Sparks, third from Devon Zuegel

Perfectionism is more often about being afraid to be bad at things

Some bits on retirement and people figuring out what they want to do.

Some interesting perspectives on who/what people are like when they stop working a while. In terms of boredom, interests, and other pursuits.

Lovely memorial about his amazing dad.

When I quit smoking 17 years ago, a wise doctor counselled me that if I was going to resist cravings, I needed a more immediate reason than "I won't get cancer in 40 years." My answer: "I spend two laptops per year on a product whose makers want to murder me and my friends."

This was a pretty solid list. Mostly simple & sensible.

Link appears to have sadly already suffered linkrot, need to start backing these things up.

Good list to re-read and remember. Be more considerate of where the years go. Also learn how to come up with phrases like this :)